A few months back, I got laid off from my job. Lucky for me, I was able to get a new one after only one week off. The bad news is that I lost all of my seniority and paid time off. Because of this, I couldn't get enough time off to join the family in Florida for our annual Christmas at the Beach. I did, however, have Friday – Sunday off. And, thanks to an email I received from Harrah's, had 3 nights available to me at the Rio for a grand total of $30. So I decided to spend a traditional Christmas in Vegas.

I left Phoenix on Christmas Eve at around 9:30 AM, expecting to arrive in Vegas around 3, play a short session of poker, and meet Minton for dinner. I got about 90 miles out of town, and got an urgent call, requiring me to head back to work. First time I ever got caught leaving early. The trip was not starting well.

I took care of the work issues, and got back on the road at about 3:00 PM. The drive was boring and uneventful, as usual, until I drove into the worst windstorm I've ever driven in just outside of Kingman. I drove into a heavy headwind that not only made keeping my speed constant difficult, but killed my gas mileage. On the plus side, there wasn't much traffic on Hoover Dam.

I stopped at the Hacienda to take care of nature's calling. What a dive! This was the only casino I've ever been in that literally sucked my will to gamble out of me. The place was empty. I was the youngest person in the room by 25 years. Nobody, dealers, players, management, anybody, had a smile on their face. I signed up for a player's card to add it to my collection, and quickly got out of there.

I arrived at the Rio at about 8. Unfortunately, that was the time I was supposed to be meeting Minton for dinner, so I had to bail on that. I checked into my room, which was nice. I like the suites, but would probably not pay rack rate to ever stay there. The king size bed was OK, and the pillows sucked. I grabbed a quick shower, and headed down to the poker room.

I was quickly seated at a $1/$3 NL game. This had to be the tightest, nittiest table I've ever been at. Everyone limped preflop, and most times a $15 bet after the flop took down the pot. I increased my aggression a bit, and was able to buy a lot of $10-$15 pots preflop. After about an hour, I was up a whopping $17 when I managed to turn a bluff into a double up against the tightest player in the entire world (TPEW).

After closely following Poker Grump's blog, I learned that the best starting hand in poker is 2-4. After reading entries from Grange95 and ckbwop, I also learned that crubs always get there. So I knew I had a monster when I saw 2c4c in the CO. As usual, the table limped to me. I raised to $17. It quickly folded around to the TPEW, who was in the highjack. He min raised me to $35, and had me covered. This could only mean AA or KK for him, so I gladly tossed in the extra $18. The flop comes out 3c 5c 10d. I don't think that I could have asked for a better flop. TPEW bets $50. I raise him to $150 with my 15 outer. He insta-shoves, and I call. A Jh on the turn didn't help me, but the Kc on the river gave me the flush. He proudly flips up 2 red aces, which is exactly where I put him preflop. I show him my flush, and he goes ballistic. I used to get into a bit of trouble as a kid, but I don't think that I ever got a lecture like the one that he gave me. Used every curse work, synonym of donkey, and racial slur that he could think of. Funny thing is, we're both white guys from the mid west (I was born in Cleveland, OH). After playing another orbit, and still listening to his diatribe, without ever responding, I rack up and leave, saying “I shouldn't be playing poker with you guys. I'm obviously over-matched.” I cash out, with a nice double up + in my first two hours.

I grab a bite at the deli next to the sports bar, and was trying to decided where to go for the rest of the evening. Then I heard the blackjack table calling my name. “Play me, Erick. You like me!” It started faintly at first, and I was doing well to ignore the calls. Then it started taunting me: “What are you, yella? You can beat me, especially if you drink too much!” I eventually gave in to its taunting, and promptly started to lose my poker profit. An hour later, and after several Budweisers, I went on a mini heater in a double deck game, and emerged up $150. I cashed out (first and only smart move I made at a BJ table all weekend), and headed back to the poker room.

I headed back to the poker room to see what kind of action there was. They were getting ready to open a $2/$5 NL game. I bought in For $500, exactly my profit from the rest of the evening. I lost $90 on the second hand at the table after flopping a boat with pocket 10's on a KKK board. An ace and a large bet from the only other player in the hand scared me into folding after the turn, only to see him flip over pocket 9's. Oh well. I played tight for about an hour, getting no real hands to play. In that same time, I saw three pots over $1500, and several more over $1000. The game turned into one of the deepest $2/$5 games I had ever played in. Guys were being aggressive, and over betting pots, just to hear themselves say raise. I picked up a few small pots with mediocre holdings, but well timed raises. I got my stack up to around $600 when the hand I was waiting for came up. Drunk LAG (DLAG) raised to $40 UTG. Three players called, and I found 9h9d OTB. I called as well, as re-raising wouldn't get anyone to fold, and I really wanted to see a flop. The flop came 9-3-3. Holy Shnike! DLAG led out for $150. It folded to me, and I smooth called. Turn came 4x, and DLAG insta-shoves. I snap call, and he flips over 4-3 for the turned underfull. A blank on the river ships me a $1340 pot, the largest one I'd win all night! I stick around for another hour, raking in another decent pot when I flopped broadway against DLAG's TPTK 4 to a flush. My straight holds up. Unfortunately, DLAG didn't re-buy after the first hurtin' I put on him, but it was still close to a $500 pot. I get up and cash out at around 3:30 AM, with slightly better than a triple up. I just knew this was going to be my trip!

On the way to the elevators to head to bed, I heard a faint whisper “I want a rematch.” I quickly realized it was the BJ table calling me again. As I got closer, the calls got louder. “Come on, you're playing with my money!” No, I said. I'm done. “One hand won't hurt. Just play one hand!” I found myself drifting towards the table, when my bladder stopped me. I decided to use the bathroom in my suite, where I couldn't hear the calls of the BJ. Phew! Potential crisis adverted!

I slept in on Christmas morning, with the intention of eating a nice Christmas Brunch at the Rio buffet, and then checking out the action at Aria. The line was ridiculous for the buffet, so I decided to head elsewhere for breakfast. After a not so quick phone call with the entire family, I parked at Monte Carlo. I walked past the buffet, but they weren't serving breakfast, only a very overpriced X-Mas dinner. I continued walking over to Aria. It's not a bad walk from MC, and, from what I've read, much easier than trying to self park.

I get on the list for $1/$3 and $2/$5, deciding I'd play whichever game that had a seat first. I walked over and checked out the sports book, and put down a $200 ML wager on the Chargers (+120, couldn't believe the hottest team in the NFL was an underdog, even on the road). I walked back to the poker room, and found that they were opening a $2/$5 game. I took my seat, and bought in for the max, $500. I couldn't believe it when I saw that only one other person bought in for the max. Everyone else bought in for the minimum $200. I thought that this game was going to be a rock fest, until I saw more all ins preflop in the first 3 orbits than I've seen in a $40 donkament at Excalibur! Shortstacks would push, bust, re-buy for $200, lather rinse, repeat. And I couldn't catch a single hand to get tangled up with them.

I mostly folded for about 2 hours. I then flopped a set of Jacks from the BB after calling a large preflop raise. I check-raised the original raiser, who simply smooth-called. I turned quads, which ended up killing my action. He folded his AA face up after the turn went check – check, and I led out on the river. That started a massive heater, where I had 5 pocket pairs preflop in 2 orbits, and all 5 flopped sets, and all 5 held up to the river. I was up almost two buy ins, when my tummy started reminding me that I hadn't eaten yet. I cashed out, and went exploring for food.

For some reason I decided that I wanted pizza, so I walked down to NYNY and grabbed a couple of slices from the Sirrico's Pizza, in the food court. Although it's nothing special, I really like their pizza.
I walked back to MC, and drove back to the Rio. I walked back to the poker room, not even looking at the BJ tables. They weren't even taunting me. Weird.

I got seated in a $1/$3 NL game with no wait. The table had 3 drunk Irishmen from San Francisco, a smooth talking Turk from Oregon, and a Spaniard from Detroit. It was the most international table I've ever sat at, and we were all American citizens. I quickly donk off a buy in when I flop TPTK with the nut flush redraw, only to miss the draw and run into the Turk's flopped two pair. I bleed away half of my next buy in over the next hour. I finally get a double up when I flop the wheel with 2-4 os from the SB. I'm beginning to think the Grump is onto something...

My hours from the previous night qualify me for the daily freeroll, so I rack up and grab my seat. 27 players showed up, and I was told that 40 actually qualified. We talked about an even 27 way chop, which would give us all $74, but management said we had to play down to 15 before we were allowed to chop. I get nothing but free beers for the first 3 levels. I then call a small raise from OTB with pocket 3's. The flop comes 7-3-2. I get it all in against a short stack, and lose to his set of 7's. Crippled, I fold for a few hands. I pus all in UTG for 3 BB with pocket 3's again. The only caller was OTB, with pocket 7's. A flop of 7-7-3 left me drawing dead. LOLdonkaments!

I decided to head to my room to formulate a plan for the rest of the evening. This time I heard the BJ tables calling loud and clear, and my inhibitions and good judgment clouded by Budweisers, I succumb. I hover around even for about two hours, all the while slamming back Buds. A bachelorette party joins the table and I quickly join them in several rounds of shots. My drunk mind tells me that I'm going to get some, but the dealer quickly reminds me that I have less game than I think I do. I lose my entire stack, somehow thinking that losing lots of money would impress them. I pull out another wad of $100's, and quickly start losing that, too. The girls leave without so much as a goodby to me. I keep playing, and drinking, against my better judgment. A nice couple from somewhere (I think they told me, I'm pretty drunk at this point) sit down. Both immediately start winning. I continue my downward spiral. So instead of getting up and going to bed, I order another beer, and start doubling my bets. Somewhere around 4 AM I stumble to a bathroom. On the way back to the table, a security guard notices me bumping into slot machines like a pinball, and suggests I go to my room. I go back to the table, bet my last $100, lose, and stumble up to my room.

I woke up Saturday at around 1 PM with a massive hangover, and a very thin wallet. Somehow, I had managed to drop $2000 at the BJ table. Dejected, ticked off at myself, and feeling very nauseous, I shower and head downstairs. The BJ table is just laughing at me. I mentally give it the bird on the way out the door. I had tickets to Believe, the Cirque show starring Criss Angel at the Luxor. I stop in at Excalibur, grab a burrito from Baja Fresh, and chug a few bottles of water. I was planning on playing a little $1/$2 at the Ex, but the show was starting at 4, so I didn't have time. I walked over to the Luxor, and couldn't believe the changes inside. I haven't been there since they de-themed the Egyptian motif. While it's very sleek and modern, it also feels cold, and uninviting. I picked up my tickets from will call, and wandered around for about 20 minutes before heading inside.

The show was awesome! I had heard so many bad things, and read mixed reviews about it online. But I thoroughly enjoyed it. Criss Angel did a lot of big illusions, mostly disappearing acts and switching places with his assistants. He was interactive with the crowd, funny, and was obviously not strictly following a script. Cirque dancers did some weird dancing, and his assistants added a sense of humor to the show. If you like magic, or his TV show Mind Freak, you'll enjoy this show.

After the show, I headed back to Aria to cash my sports book ticket. I got seated right away in a very deep stacked $2/$5 game. I fold pretty much everything, and establish a tight table image. After a few orbits, I decide to use that image, and raise to $25 from the CO with 5s2s. I get called by four of the limpers. So much for table image. But then I hit the miracle flop: 5-5-2. It checks to me, I bet $50, and everyone insta-folds. I show my 5-2, and the table goes crazy, saying they couldn't believe that “I” of all people would play that hand. That advertising got me paid off a few hands later.

Again, it limped to me in the HJ. I raise to $30 with KdKs. The button calls. The BB raises to $150. I reraise to $400, leaving about $200 behind. OTB folds, BB pushes in for $475. I call. The board comes A-A-4-9-9. I table my KK, and the BB mucks. Someone asks here what she had, and all she says is “I had him beat preflop.” The other guy then points out that if she had me beat preflop, then she folded quads on the river. All she says is “I had him beat preflop”.

I go on another little tear, hitting a flush with 7-4s to crack a guys set of 10's, and outflop AA with KQ os when I flop 2 pair. I cash out at about 2 AM, exhausted from the hangover, with a near triple up. I curse my self when I put the money in my wallet and realize that I should be up another $2000 for the trip.

I head back to the Rio. Anyone guess what happens next? Yep, I sit down at another stupid BJ table. I swear, I'm starting to feel like TBC and his stupid machines that everyone yells at him about. I have a few beers, and lose another $300. I call it a night around 4 AM.

I wake up at 10, shower, pack up, and check out of the Rio. I decided to play one last session at Aria before heading out. They have a long list for the $1/$3 game, but I was first on the list for $2/$5. I get seated after about 10 minutes. The plan was to play until I either doubled up, or it got to be 3 PM. I still had to drive home, and I had to be at work the next morning.

I lost a couple of pots splashing around with garbage early on. I tightened up for a few orbits, and so did the rest of the table. It was getting close to 3:00, and I just about ready to leave. I called a raise from an aggro in LP with 10-10 OTB. Flop comes out A-J-10. Aggro checks to me, I lead out for $50. He smooth calls. That call actually scared me a bit, as he has been known to slowplay his monster hands, and over play his medium strength hands. The turn comes the case 10! Second time in two days that I flop a set and turn quads! Aggro shoves all in, I snap call, and he proudly tables pocket jacks, for the turned boat. I show him my quads, and he looks likes he's going to hurl. The river blanks, and I'm now up a small amount for the session. Thinking back, I think that that was my first time hitting a true one outer. It's fun, and I highly recommend it if you ever get a chance!

I then go on a nasty cooler streak. I lose half my stack when I get it all in with A9 against J9 on a 9-9-5 flop, only to see the turn bring a 5 for a chop, then the river bring her a J for the bigger full house. Two hands later, I get it all in with AA vs KK, and, of course, a king in the window busts me. I decide that I don't want to drive the next 5 hours thinking about a bad beat, so I buy back in. The table get ultra tight, and nothing much happens for the next few hours. It's now almost 9 PM, and I still have to drive home. I win a few small pots, and decide that I'll call it a night at 10 PM, which should give me enough time to drive home, get a quick nap, shower, and head to work. Right around 9:45, the two table big stacks go on a heater, and knock out 4 of the smaller stacks. I'm just about to grab some racks, and cash out my $750, for a half buy in loss, when another table breaks, and the game gets filled. Two very large stacks come to the table, and I recognize both of them from previous sessions as donators. They must have gotten lucky, as both came to the table with $1200+. I decide to stay until midnight to see if I can get unstuck.

It starts off to be a good decision, when I rake a $500 pot with QJ when I flopped broadway against one guy's flopped set. He played very cautiously, and wouldn't let me build a bigger pot. I then lost a lot of it back when, in a three way pot, I flopped a flush with 76. The board paired on the turn, and the other two guys in the hand got into a raising war. I dumped my flush, but not until I had already committed $300. The other two got it all in, with one turning a full house, and the other having flopped the nut flush. It was a good lay down, but was still costly. The table again thinned out, and, again, I should have left. It was now 1 AM, and with a 5 hour drive, and a one hour time change, I was going to be late for work.

I knew my boss was out of town, and that I didn't have to go to the office in the morning, so I decided to stay. A new guy (HD- Heavy Drinker) sat down at around 1:30. He bought in for $500, lost it all on his first hand when he went all in preflop with pocket 9's against a big stacks pocket K's. HD rebought, and immediately ordered a double Jack and Coke, along with a shot of Patron. He continued to drink heavily. In fact, I was very impressed by his alcohol consumption, and tolerance. A friend of his was getting crushed in a PLO game, but would walk over to our table every 10 minutes to do another shot. The drunker he got, the wilder he played, and the luckier he got. HD went on a tear, building his stack to around $1500. I can't even figure his profit if you factor in his EDV (expected drinking value- $1 to Grange95 for the reference). He was talking a lot of smack, but was very entertaining. It was probably the most fun I've had at a table in a long time. He managed to insult every player at the table, including himself, and still not tick anyone off.

I managed to double my stack to a little over $1000 when I flopped a straight, and a very nice German guy couldn't get away from his two pair. I dabbled in some small pots with HD. I knew that with the way he was playing, and amount he was drinking (I couldn't believe he was still standing, much less playing decent, if not wild, poker), that I could find a good place to get it all in with him. I let him bluff me out some small pots, deciding that if I were going to go to war with this guy, I was going to have a monster when I did. Unfortunately, when the two of us did get it all in, my flopped set got run down by a river diamond, giving him the nut flush. I decide that I'll skip work, as it's already 3:30 AM, and buy back in. The game, aside from just HD, is just too juicy to leave.

A friend of his (DF- Drunk Friend) sits down to my immediate right. This guy is so drunk, that I can't understand a word that he's saying. He buys in for $500. The chip runner brings both of us our chips, just as we're getting it all against each other on the turn. I turned a straight with 7s8s, and DF couldn't get away from his pocket KK's. He cursed me in drunken mumble, and immediately rebought. Meanwhile, HD gets it all in with the other table big stack. Both turned the same straight, but HD was free rolling with a spade draw. He spikes a spade on the river, and now has a stack of almost $3000. The game gets down to 5 handed. I won a few more small pots against the other guys at the table, but just couldn't find a good hand to fight HD with. HD continued to raise every single hand he played, and kept raking in small pot after small pot. It's now 4:30 AM, when the hand I'd been waiting for finally materializes.

HD raises UTG to $25. I call from OTB with 10h8h. The flop comes 8d-8s-3d. HD bets $100. I raise him to $300. He snap calls. The turn is the 10d. He bets $500, all the while telling me that I should fold, that he “100% has the best hand”. He's been saying this every time he bets big, so I obviously don't believe him. I'm beat by only pocket 10's, and if he as them, then this would be one sick cooler. I shove my $900, he snap calls and tables AdKd, for the nut flush. I show him my full house. He congratulates me on a nice hand, even shaking my hand, and telling me how well I played the hand (the hand actually played itself, for the most part). As I'm stacking my chips, his PLO buddy starts bugging him to go to a strip club. They agree to leave at 5:00 AM for the club. I politely decline, explaining that I have to drive home. HD looked right at me and said “You stayed here all night just to get a shot at me, didn't you?” I smiled. He said “I don't blame you. I would've too.” I rack up at 5:00 AM, thinking the game was about to break, as HD was leaving. Instead, two more players sat down, and HD decided to stay. I decided it was time to leave, as my phone was going to start ringing with work stuff any minute. I cash out for $2625, a nice $1125 profit, after roughly 16 hours at the table.

The drive home sucked. I couldn't stay awake, no matter how many energy drinks I drank. I stopped at a truck stop in Kingman, with the intention of taking a 20 minute catnap to rejuvenate me. I slept through my phone alarm, and woke up 3 hours later, freezing my butt off. I finished the drive home, getting back to my apartment around 3:00 PM. I showered, made a sandwich, then went to bed.

Overall, I had a blast. Overall, I was up about $3300 in poker, down $2150 in blackjack, and up $240 on my one sports bet.

The biggest lesson learned on the trip? I should not be left alone in a casino.