Disclaimer: Only limit poker was played. 2-4 for 99% and 3-6 limit for about 15 minutes. Bankroll, alcohol intake, and an underwhelming poker ability rationalizes this decision.

This trip was booked around the Western Veterinary Conference at the Mandalay Bay 2/14-2/18. Accomodations were the Excalibur x 6 nights and the Flamingo x 1 night.

2/13

First bad beat of the trip was a cancelled flight. Six hundred dollars in plane tickets, $80 in parking, and 2hrs each way in travel and I make it out the same day as originally planned. Thanks a lot, Delta.

I ditch the bags and walk the strip to the Imperial Palace. IP has my favorite little poker room. I feel "at home" here and the majority of the trip will be spent in this room. I quickly sit in a 2-4 limit game. Stack is up and down but I've got a nearly unlimited supply of draft Blue Moon coming....touchdown. A maniac crazy asian guy sits down close to the end of my game. He raises any limped pot with any two cards. He's running over the table and complains when anyone beats him. I finally find KK and enter a raising war with him (JJ). Board comes out 77J. The turn is a blank and the river is a K giving me a bigger boat. He loses 3/4 of his stack and curses me in a foreign language and leaves. Lucky, sure, but he earned zero respect in his raise at all costs play. I cash out dead even (but + eleventybillion beers).

After not coming close to finishing dinner (Has House) we cab back to Excal. Against my better judgement I head to the poker room instead of bed. Forty five minutes later I cash out dead even and dead tired. Ive now been up for close to 28 hours with a dozen or so beers. Vegas sure can alter your normal patterns!

2/14

Five hours of sleep and I'm awake. I sit in a new 2-4L game at Excalibur. I win zero hands in 2 hours and cash out -$64. Sigh. Nothing to report hand-wise. Big aces whiffed as did the one or two pocket pairs I saw. Excalibur felt different to me- recognized several dealers but it didn't have the fun feel it used to for me.

After the conference/dinner/show I headed back to IP.I ended up playing for close to 6 hrs and left with a massive $13 profit and eleventybillion beers. Zero hands of interest that I remember. Against my better judgement I stop at Bally's poker room on the way back to the hotel...about 3am. I sit in a short-handed 3-6L game for about 10 minutes before the game breaks. Down $7 I walk back to Excalibur and stumble into the room at 4:30 am. Again amazed that running on fumes and feeling like ass I could pull those sort of hours.

2/15 Dilly dally through conference/lunch.
I finally end up at the Flamingo for a 2hr session of 2-4L with a $19 profit. Flamingo is running an aces cracked promo for $100 8am-8pm with $20 in the pot. It's caused the room to get a little more nitty. I had one guy sitting in the 9 seat whose goal in life was to call string raises. He'd scream it across the table when he perceived one. Had it called on me and just looked up at the dealer. She turned to him and said I verbally declared it. My life is dull but thank god it's not dull enough to be the ever vigilant watchman for string-bets at 2-4 limit.

I head over to my regular haunt (IP) and play a 3 hr session of 2-4L. The deck absolutely hit me in the face. I end up with a $99 profit. The one hand of note I actually lost. I have AA under the gun and raise. Big blind re-raises me and it caps 5-6 players around. I cbet a flop with no face cards and 1 club. Turn is a club. Four of us remain while I continue to bet. Three players to the river which drops a third club. I bet and am raised by the 8 seat. Knowing Im beat I make the crying call. I have Aces, the big blind has kings, and the 8 seat had 57clubs for the rivered flush (with no straight draw). That's 2-4 limit for you. This was the first time all trip my big hands hadn't held up. Amazing.

Head downtown for the evening. I head over to the Nugget for poker. I use the ACG coupon $60 for $50 in the poker room and grab a 2-4L seat. I was the youngest player at the table by at least 30 years. When the cocktail waitress passed our table for the fourth time without stopping I racked up down $10. I play drinking poker, dammit.

I tromp over to Binions (I prefer the room- spacier and nicer looking). It was almost a ghost town. They were spreading short handed 2-4L and 1-2NL games. The 1-2NL game broke for the tournament. I sat down at 2-4L and continued to get hit in the face with the deck. I honestly don't remember any specific hands except that all my big pairs held up. Cocktail service was much improved and the waitress brought them quicker than I could drink them. 3.5 hours left with me $102 profit. Unbelievable....I had doubled up at 2-4 exactly once before this trip and here it was twice in one day.

We head to the snack bar area for a late breakfast. My slot jockey buddy is soon accosted by two hookers who each grab one of his arms. He literally screams "I'M MARRIED!" and they scatter as heads turn to look in his direction. I have the "hangover burger"- burger with cheese, bacon, and fried egg. Holy God this thing was awesome. I was inebriated but it was heavenly. Cab back to Excal and hit the bed at 3:30am.

2/16 Wake up late and find that my poker winnings are gone. It finally dawns on me that when I took my camera out to take a picture of the hangover burger that the hundred dollar bills must have fallen out of my pocket- foolishly didn't put them in my wallet. That put a large large bummer on the day. $200 ain't much to most people but to a low roller whose plane ticket almost tripled it was a big defeat. Luckily the money lost was profit. Either the hookers or the housekeeping staff were pleasantly surprised.

Conference/lunch/dinner/show
We head back to Excalibur. I play 2-4L for 1.5 hours and cash out down $38. Excal has become my kryptonite. No big starting hands, no sets, no draws that hit. I took the night off from beer and hit the bed at 1:15am. Excalibur was fairly busy.

2/17 Conference/lunch/etc

I lose $100 over 3 sessions at IP/Flamingo/IP. IP's 2-4L game was breaking between promo hours unfortunately so I'd trek to the pink chicken and then back. My notes don't reveal how I managed to do this but I'd bet alcohol played a role in it.

After dinner I sit down at a wild 2-4L game. There's a gentleman there that was playing during my earlier session. The alcohol apparently hit him hard and he was wasted. A group of Dutch kids joined the table and he kept yelling towards them about drinking good beer like budweiser and changing their rooms at IP while gesticulating wildly. I finally told them they were Dutch not deaf which got a good chuckle from the young guys. The kids hit the club scene and we fill partly up.

Our drunk friend rebought $100 and continued to donk it off raising on the river with ace high and chips flying all over the place. He'd bet $7 at a time with the chips rolling in three different directions. The hand of the evening soon happened. I had 77, a very nice gentleman across from me had 88, and drunky had A6off. The flop was Q82. Drunky bet, I called (should have folded but knew he was zero concern), and other man smooth called. Turn was a 7 giving me bottom set. Drunky bet, I raised, other guy smooth called. The river was a Q giving two of us boats. I bet, other guy raises, drunky re-raises, I call, and luckily other guy just calls. I lost a good chunk of change but it could have been much much worse.

I soon stacked drunky on a board of 7799Q with a nine in my hand. Floor had recently cut him off from alcohol. I asked the dealer if it was ethical for me to raise into him knowing he was drunk and had squat and decided that yes it was. Asking him to rebuy again would have been in the grey area! Our very nice drunk friend has been tipping the dealer on every hand he loses. Looks at me and yells "Woooooooo you're great." and throws me a pile of silver (IP rakes in 50c increments). He stands to go to his room and it's obvious that it's going to be ugly. Dealer convinces him to sit down and calls the floor to get a security escort. He reaches into his wallet and gives the dealer $5. Security shows up and he can't remember his room number. I get his cell phone and call his daughter (who seems not at all concerned). Security gets a wheelchair (drunky looks at security and says "Gosh darn you're one damn big sherrif!" and gives the guy a 5 spot) and rolls him into the evening. This breaks the game and I leave up $34. Bed at 12:30am.

2/18 Conference/lunch and then back to IP for a four hour session. Went from up $35 to down $40 real quick and decided I needed a break. Had Kings cracked by A7off for $50 during the promo period.

Headed to Cabo Wabo Cantina for dinner. No line and we sat at the railing overlooking the strip. We had a partial view of the Bellagio fountains. The rest of our view was of a 6 foot 300 pound man wearing a bra, skirt, fishnet stockings, and platform shoes. On his bared belly was "Manwhore for tips" in permanent marker. He was shooting off one-liners to passers-by ("Sir guess what your wife is gonna be dreaming about tonight?") and posing for pictures. It kept us and other diners in hysterics. The food was average but decently priced.

Afterwards I went back to lose more at poker. Here I stopped keeping track but was down about $100 on the day. I watched a gentleman clear over $300 (profit) from the table while I was there. He played any two cards, chased to the river, and hit 80% of the time. I have never, ever seen anything like it.

He set one guy on uber monkey feces flinging tilt. It was hilarious. Dude was a bit of a jerk (dealer claimed he was a local but didn't seem it to me). He watched the guy on a heater/chaser/catcher and started raising blind and berating the man. The guy simply continued to chase and took the guys entire starting stack and two rebuys. Tilty is screaming about how horrible he's playing and the man continues to chew his cigar and stack his chips. I thought he was going to stroke out at the table.

2/19 Switch hotels due to the airline screw-up as I get an extra day in Vegas.

I played 2-4 at IP for 6 hours. Played a long part of the session with a younger guy who fell in love with the button straddle. Best I can remember he was 11 of 15 with his straddle hands while winning the first eight in a row. Hand of the session was his button straddle that capped PF when I had aces in middle position. Flop was J26. Turn a 8 and river a 3. It ended up with he and I heads up- aces lose to a set of jacks. He played aggressively for 2-4 but smartly. It was hard to put him on that big of a hand but I figured I was behind. Session was a lot of fun but back down $40 again.

Dinner and a nap....then back to IP and 2-4 limit. My body is shutting down from lack of sleep, bad food, and too much beer. I call it an early night at midnight (down $40-ish). Bid farewell to my friends at IP and head over to Flamingo. The room was PACKED Friday night- that may always be the case but this was my first Friday night in Vegas so a different experience for me.

So losing trip but it was a lot of fun (several fantastic tables) and the beer quantity more than made up for the losses. Many thanks to the dealers/floors at IP for some great times.