So here's the disclaimer up front:

I play limit. I enjoy limit. I drink. I enjoy drinking. Putting the two together in a solo vegas trip is gold for me. I understand that the idea of this trip is for most people like stabbing themselves in the eye repeatedly with a rusty fork. Due to my bankroll, my skill level, and my propensity to drink at the table I have still failed to bust my Vegas NL cherry (it was supposed to happen this trip....but I was drinking).

May 23rd
Easy flights from RDU-DFW-LAS
I managed to not get tunneled and end up at the luxurious Imperial Palace at roughly 11:45 pm. I go up to the room…..and find that housekeeping never took care of the room. Bedspreads and covers all messed up and yep those are skidmarks in the toilet.

Head downstairs and find a line 30+ people deep at midnight. I assume the smart play would be to return to my room and call down. Getting on the elevator I hear “can you hold the door for me sweetie?” Well, sure. I’m soon grabbed around the arm by a young woman who then asks if she could come to my room. Wow, I’ve been in Vegas for less than an hour and I’m being attacked by a hooker. I politely decline and she doesn’t get it. Tell her I’m moving rooms because it’s a disaster and I get the line “All boys rooms are messy…I don’t care.” I look at her and say I’m really not interested and this room has shit in the toilet still. She figured it out. I get profuse apologies and upgraded to a luv-tub room. I get settled in and should have called it a night but nope I’m in Vegas so I’m headed out.

May 24th
Still my “day one” but it’s Monday. I head over to the IP poker room- my home away from home. Why IP? IP has some of the friendliest dealers in town, Blue Moon on draft, and my hotel room is 7 minutes from the table. Score.

I get seated quickly at the only 2-4L game being spread somewhere around 1am. Unfortunately the table breaks about 2:30 am and I’m down about $20 with no memorable hands but a good buzz. The smart person would go to bed, right?

Of course that means I meander down to the Flamingo and get seated in a 2-4 game there. It's a fun table with a local who decided to get blitzed with us and a floorman who kept us in stitches. The cards and beer keep coming and suddenly I notice it’s daylight outside. Wow. We got down to four handed for about an hour and I played drunkenly stupid and crippled my stack. I win an adequate pot with Ace-King and cash out at 8:15am....down $60-80 or so. Wow. The smart person would go to bed now, right?

Of course I wander back to the IP marveling at my first full all-nighter in Vegas. Well look the “aces cracked” promo is running. I should sit down…. I play for about 45 minutes before our table broke in a rock tight game. Cash out $13 to the good and decide I need to eat. Fun playing with an off-duty IP floorman and RR dealer (and a variety of tight grumbly locals)

I meander up to HHAGG, eat a meatloaf and eggs platter, and stumble to the room. I sleep like the dead from 10am-4pm. I wake up and loudly curse how stupid I am. Shower and head to the Mirage. I pick up my ticket for LOVE this evening ($55 special from the Summer of Cirque promo). Mirage’s 3-6L game is full in the poker room so it’s back to IP.

I donk around some more at the tables from 6-7:30pm. Again no hands of note and cash out slightly down. I return to the Mirage and eat at the bar at BLT. LOVE was absolutely amazing.

Back to the IP poker room for some more 2-4 limit until 1am. Details are hazy at best but I remember my boat falling to quads at some point. It wasn't a winning session but less than a $40 loss equals out the beer consumed.

May 25th:

I wake up around 8:30 am feeling soooo much better. I decide to check out the Aria buffet. The breakfast buffet was fantastic. I wander around and find the Aria poker room which looks amazing. Unfortunately they weren’t spreading a limit game this early in the morning so it’s back to the IP. Around 10-ish am they had a 5-10 NL game (looked to be 3-4 players) and a full 1-3NL game down front.

The Imperial Palace poker room is currently running a promo for $100 for aces cracked from 8am-4pm. This draws a large number of older, nittier, locals. The majority of these folks are pleasant but some are a bit hard to handle. Blue Moon makes the harder ones easier to tolerate. No high hands and I cash out down $60 after about 6 hours. The hand of the session saw me losing with 7s full of fours to quad fours. Pocket 7s for me with A4 on the button. Limped pre-flop with a flop of 744. Yahtzee. I bet and am called in two spots. Turn is a 3. I bet, player on the button raises, other guy folds, and I three bet, he raises, and I cap it. River is an ugly, ugly 4. I check, he bets, and I make the crying call to see his ace-four that counterfeited me on the river. Sigh.

Dinner is the Burger Palace at IP. The plan for the evening was to hit up downtown. I decide to monorail to the Sahara and check out their poker room. I get there and find the poker room dark….really no games at all at 5-6pm? I can’t find the ACE stop so end up cabbing downtown.

For some inexplicable reason I check out the poker room at the Plaza. They have a small room that had one short-handed 2-4 game going. It’s a depressing place. 90% of the folks buy in for the $20 minimum. I sit with $60 and am considered a high roller. Had a great dealer and cashed out up about $30 in 30 minutes. Bad play, bad room, and just wretched overall casino. It's by far the most depressing poker room I've ever played in.

I stroll over to my favorite room downtown- Binions. One 2-4 game and one 2-4 half kill game. I get seated in the 2-4 game after about 10 minutes. It’s a shame that this room does not get more action as I find it beautiful and much, much more comfortable than the Nugget. I sit and don’t win a single hand while I’m at the table. Unbelievable. I cash out down $50 when the table breaks.

I decide to head back towards “home”. I find the Fremont St. ACE stop and take it to the Sahara. A quick check of the poker room finds it now filling up due to their nightly tournaments. I sit at a brand new 2-4 table after a brief wait and this is where my luck begins to change. Over the course of the evening we have three players who have never played live before. One gentleman would routinely bet $9 in a fixed limit game with a max bet of $4 and check out on the river. I win a nice pot with aces full of kings over aces full of jacks with a three ace board. The pot should have been a lot bigger but I was still leery after losing to quads in the morning.
It also sparked a lengthy discussion as to if it should have qualified for the bad beat jackpot- hell I was jazzed I didn't lose to quads for a third time.

Shortly thereafter I find pocket nines and a flop of 9K2. There’s a bet and my raise on the flop which brings us to two handed on the turn. The turn is a 9. Bingo. Bet, I raise, re-raise, and I re-raise. He mucks (never showed what he folded). Some would say I should have called and hoped for an action card on the river but this guy hadn’t folded all night so what the hell. I flip the 9s and take in a nice $233 high hand bonus. I continue to scoop pots off the crazy guys at the other end of the table.

Our cocktail waitress was amazing. She was very pregnant but was bringing out full trays of drinks every 10 minutes. I didn’t order a beer for the last two hours I was there….she just brought them. At 2:30 am I cash out for $380 (including HH bonus) but minus dealer toke on the bonus and tips for a jabillion beers. I cab back to IP and sanely skip sitting in another game.

I found the dealers to be older but a lot of fun. They didn't take any grief from anyone but were telling all sorts of old school stories they kept us rolling all night long...except for the non-english speaking $9 better in the 8 seat.

I call room service and fall asleep before they deliver my omelet. In a half sleep-half boozy coma I eat half of it before returning to sleep.

May 26th:

I wake up to find half an omelet on the other side of the bed. Ugh. I eat the toast that’s left and quickly escort the remains outside the hotel door. I wander downstairs and return to my haunts in the IP poker room. Nothing major of note until about 3pm. My second card is being dealt and it’s accidently exposed as the 8 of diamonds. I get a new card and look at my hand….I now have pocket aces. The aces end up getting craked (by J9 for two pair IIRC) and I get a $100 bonus. Odd promo to try and lose but money is money.

At 5pm I realized I hadn’t eaten all day. I cash out up $80 on the session and hit up HHAGG. I mistakenly order one the one pound stuffed burgers. It tasted phenomenal but those things put me in a food coma each time I eat them. I surrender after about half of it and get an order of cheesecake to go. Returning to the room I think I’ll just lay down for a second. Four hours later I awaken. D’oh.

Back downstairs for another session in the IP. I get seated after a short wait and find a fun table….until “she” comes. A new player is seated at our table who is the most obnoxious player I’ve ever sat at a table with. She claims to be a dealer in town for the WSOP. Her volume level is about a 12 and for no reason. She just routinely speaks in a shout. She reeks of cheap liquor and plays like a maniac. I don’t mind maniac play as it can end up being insanely profitable to catch one but her personality just brought the table to a screeching halt. She routinely screeched about she hated “this game” (limit) blah blah blah. Between not winning a single hand in three hours and annoying lady I cash out down $40 and go back to the room for a relatively early evening at 1am.

May 27th:

I decide today is the day to do the buffet of buffets. I wander down to PHo and find a line that takes about 10-15 minutes. I purchase my 24hr pass and am seated. The buffet was great and they even had a crepe station for “dessert”.

Another day means more grinding away at the IP. A seven hour session and down $15 but up that many beers isn’t too bad. Tired at this point I just trudge next doors for Harrah’s buffet. The line probably took 20 minutes and I was more than underwhelmed with the buffet. Poor choices, crowded stations, and just a blah experience. Food coma hits me again and I spend some time napping in the room.

Waking up I return to my usual spot at a 2-4 table. The table is fun and light-hearted and profitable for me. Then who sits down to my left but “she”. The screeching begins immediately and I get a strong whiff of cheap vodka. I think it may have been Aristocrat which I remember drinking during my college days. She sits down with $80 and says it has to last until midnight because she’s over her withdrawal limit. She blindly raises her first three hands. Pocket kings for me leads to a decent pot with her. Checked the river when I should have bet on a semi-scary board because lord knows what she had. The entire table goes silent while she performs for us. She keeps saying she needs to get money from her boyfriend. She gets stacked and stumbles away from the table. We quickly ask the dealer to toss a reserved button on the seat.

Luckily drunken she beast never returns. Around 2am we hear a commotion in the lobby area. There is a big fight between the two sets of doors in the IP. At least three guys are going at it. The poker room comes to a halt as we all gawk at the display. Security finally tackles everyone and two guys are placed in cuffs. One gentleman has a mask of blood on his face and a probably broken nose. One cuffed guy is crying one minute and the next he is howling like a wolf and “knee-walking” towards another guy to continue the fight. EMTs treat several people and at least two guys are taken away by the cops. Interesting diversion… This was followed by a player who lit a cigarette at the table. After being told he couldn’t smoke in the room he put the cigarette behind his ear…still lit. The dealer noticed the smoke and the man’s slightly singed hair a few minutes later. I play until 3:30am with some terrific fellows from England and call it a night knowing I have to check out tomorrow.

May 28th:

Check out day. I lounge in the room as long as possible as my flight is not until 1am. Checkout via the TV about 10:30am and guess where I went?

I hop into a game at the IP poker room and don’t leave for 12 and a half hours. That’s a new record for me for one sitting. Lunch was a club sandwich in the poker room and indulged in a table-side massage as well. So after a huge grind where did it leave me? After poker, lunch, massage, and a half dozen beers I cashed out plus $15. Not too shabby.

Today featured a man who got passed over on the list demanding a seat...and the floor asking us to play 11 handed. The new IP tables comfortably seat 9. A regular volunteered to give up his seat so we wouldn't be playing ridiculous.

I was also treated to a semi-regular who left his seat after every hand and literally threw his cards at the dealer after getting drawn out on. Dude, it's 2-4 limit. It's gonna happen...a lot. Mumbling how this place isn't the Venetian is worthy of "Deep Thoughts" on Saturday Night Live. I'm not a great player but you got stacked at the 2-4 table, threw your cards at the dealer a half dozen times, verbally berated players (my nut flush thanks you!)....it just can't be worth the $100 cracked aces promo.

The last player of note was a gentleman staying at the IP that was going to play a WSOP event on Saturday. He was a lot of fun at the table and realized the differences between NL and limit. He decided to stay at our limit table after 3 different NL tables opened up. He said "This is the kind of poker I was looking for today- fun. I'll get plenty of serious play tomorrow." That sums up 2-4 for me. It's rarely profitable (generally only with high hands / promos) but it's poker, cheap entertainment, and a great way to meet oddball folks around Vegas.

May 29th:
Leave Vegas 1:05 am and finally connect to RDU at 11:30 am. Drive straight to Glen Jean, West Virginia, for a whitewater rafting/camping trip.

May 30th: Raft 14 miles down the New River and become a member of the involuntary swim team in the Middle Keeneys rapid. That was not fun.

May 31st: Drive home and realize I am WAY too old to pull this.

I have goals each Vegas trip and generally fail to reach them. Goals that passed by in a drunken haze this time around: breaking my NL cherry, Ellis Island, meeting up with 24fanatics.
Goals accomplished: playing in 2 new (for me) Vegas rooms, 1st all-nighter, and a new single sitting record.