Hey all,

This was my third poker trip to Vegas in the past two years. Finally ran into a couple of AVPers this time around, including miamicane, TBC, missingflops and dshapiro.
This TR will include lots of poker, as well as brief restaurant reviews, and a plug for the greatest hotel ever, the Mandarin Oriental.
It is mega long, so grab a beer/drink, get comfy and strap in for the long haul.

Let’s get going.

First cooler of the trip was the flight into Vegas. We were scheduled to leave Calgary at 1800 on May 23, but after having our flight re-routed through San Francisco, then delayed twice in Calgary and once in San Fran, we ended up getting to Vegas around 0200 on the 24th. Thanks United, I’ll never fly with you again. Wifey and I were super pissed because they never once announced the delays, we just had to find them on the board at the airport. There were no apologies for the inconvenience by anyone. To compare, on a recent Westjet flight that was one hour behind, they apologized profusely and give us a $100 refund. Yes, United sucks, Westjet rules.

Once we finally arrived Tuesday at 0200, I had only had 6 hours of sleep since Saturday night, as I was on call all day in the hospital Sunday. Wifey had also just gotten off working nights as well, so we were pretty bagged on the plane. But, seeing the shining lights of Vegas woke me right up, and the was no MUST SLEEP IMMEDIATELY for this poker degen.

First session: Harrah's 2 AM on Tuesday right after arriving.
Having had basically no sleep in 48 hours, I still needed some poker as soon as we touched down. Decided to walk down and check out the Harrah's room, which I'd never played in before. 2 tables running at 0200. Fairly nitty play, especially considering the hour. Surprised to see what appeared to be a couple of local grinders at that time as well, and they mentioned the WSOP seat promotion, which made me think this would be a tight/bad table to get any action.
The one highlight was the super drunk guy to my left who could barely see straight, but had about $1000 on the table. Over the course of the first 10-15 hands I saw top set played super aggressively twice, and no one betting/calling without monsters. Bad vibe so I only played for about 30 minutes and left down $6.

Session 2: Venetian 2:30 AM Tuesday
This was the first fun table of the trip. One super drunk guy was jamming with ATC. He arrived at the table hammered drunk, and promptly ordered a double Wild Turkey, 2 budweisers and a gin and tonic. He was so drunk that he could just barely keep one eye open, but bet every hand pre-flop to $7. If someone else bet, he would 3-bet to 3 times the initial bet. He would then show hands like 82os, 94, etc. Seriously, this guy would stare people down with his one half-closed eye, and barely able to sit up in his chair. It was awesome. Everyone at the table was just waiting to catch this guy, but he was hilarious. His stack went $200 to $800 to felted in about an hour. He re-bought a couple of times, and got felted each time. Finally, he pulls out some $10, $5 and $1 bills and tries to buy-in for about $45. Floor says no, and he takes off to go play some craps. I imagine he did not wake up happy the next morning.
One really funny hand came up after he had run his stack up to about $800 over a half hour, showing bluffs on most of the hands. There was a bald younger guy on my left in seat 7 who was Hollywooding a bit whenever he was in a hand. The drunk pirate in seat 1 would call him out on it and say “stop f#%$%g Hollywooding” or “here we go again”, even though he could barely speak.
I don’t remember the details exactly, but someone caught the drunk guy in a bluff and seat 7 (who isn’t even in the hand) yells “F@#k you” across the table at the drunk guy. I was like “whoa, whoa, calm down dude” and the dealer gave the guy a pretty stern warning. It was a pretty DB move by the bald guy, in my opinion.
Anyway, the crappiest part was that I was insanely card dead for the whole time. Not even any suited one gappers or anything to play.
Cashed out -163 over 5 hours.

Went back to Harrah’s for a 2 hour sleep break.

Session 3: Venetian mid-day on Tuesday
This is where I first start LAGging it up and playing quite well, felting a couple of people with speculative hands and begin the process of being more aggressive and value betting much thinner. Donk off about $50 playing 63os, but end up +117 over 3.5 hours.

Dinner at Raku (Awesome crazy deliciousness, this is an amazing restaurant with Robatayaki grill, sashimi and Oden) - Did the Omakase menu, which was about 10 courses for $75/person and a crazy value. Just put yourself in the chef’s hands, and you will be happy for doing so. Looking back on the trip, this was right up there with E by Jose Andres and Joel Robuchon in terms of quality, at a fraction of the price. We will be going back.
It is only a $10-15 cab ride from the strip on Spring Mountain road. There is also a noodle house next door to Raku which is supposed to be fantastic and very cheap.

Session 4: PHo Wednesday AM 0100-0300
Weird table, and I can't say I'm a huge fan of the PHo room. The action isn't as crazy loose as expected either, based on my small sample size of 3 sessions there.
On the first hand I try to bluff 3rd pair on the river and get called down by a business-man looking DB who has 2nd pair. It was a good call and I think my line looked pretty strong, but he immediately starts talking to his wife about how bad I am. I immediately have an uber loose table image, which is quite hilarious. I decide that I can now just play premium hands and get paid off against that guy.
Later on the same guy (who is terrible at poker) gets felted and his wife plays instead. She runs $100 up to $400 by making 2 full houses with pocket 6s in about one hour. Pretty funny.
Leave up $31 after coming back from down $100. Doubling up with pocket jacks on a 10-9-2 flop is the key hand to get me into the black.
Wifey also has an interesting session at PHo, and is down to $72 from her $150 buy-in. I have cashed out and am railbirding her when she says she wants to play one more orbit. Sure enough, she pushes her $72 all-in on a flop of J-10-8 rainbow and gets two callers who both have about $400 behind. They end up getting it all in by the river as well. I am pretty sure that wifey is behind to someone’s flopped straight, but when another Jack pairs the board on the turn, her face tells me that she just boated up. River is a brick and she turns over J10 for the big boat, V1 has Q9 for the flopped nut straight, and V2 has J8 for the underfull. Case jack on the turn, wow. If only she had been playing deeper.

Session 5: Venetian Wednesday AM 0330-0800
This is another hilarious table, and both wifey and I get sat in the same game.
Seat 1 is a rotating number of card dead old nits, and about three hands (AA,KK,KK) are played from the one seat over the next 5 hours.
Seat 2 is a rather large black girl who is falling asleep at the table. She literally sleeps for about an hour after we get there, and then finally plays a hand where she raises PF and c-bets on an ace-high flop. Everyone folds and she disgustedly folds her top set of aces face up. She pretends like it’s a crappy table because she got little action, then tilts herself and proceeds to stack off with KQ about an hour later. Plus, she is kind of a buzzkill at the table, as everyone is joking and having fun, except her.
Seat 3 = not memorable
Seat 4 is wifey, seat 5 is me. I am uber-card dead this whole session, and after a few hours am getting tremendous respect whenever I bet. I use this to my advantage and run-up a $193 profit without any really memorable hands.
Seat 6 is a young baseball player guy from Michigan, who plays pretty tight and doesn’t do much over the night.
Seat 7 is a freshly minted low stakes Vegas grinder, who just moved here a week ago to play 1/2 for a living. At first I give this guy some credit for being good, but realize by the end of the night that he is pretty brutal. I don’t expect him to make it long. If you see an early 20s guy with braces and a goatee, watch out, he sucks.
Seat 8 is a boy genius type. Non-stop talker, but pretty entertaining.
Seat 9 is a mid 30s guy who keep stalking about his wife who will be delivering their first child in the next couple of weeks. Somehow we get into doctor talk, and seats 7-9 and me are all talking about dealing babies on the table, placenta fighting and a whole bunch of other gross s$%t. It was pretty funny. Seat 9 was a big fish and ran his stack up to about $900, then lost most of it before calling it a night and cashing out.
A really fun table, but can’t remember any really significant hands.

After playing at V until 0800, we head to Bouchon for breakfast, which really hits the spot after a long poker night. I realize that after being up so long, we both look vampire-pale a la Tom Dwan. We come to the conclusion that the pale color and stunned look on his face is not a poker face at all, but simply what someone looks like when they don't sleep and play poker non-stop.
5 hour nap and back to the V.

Session 6: Venetian Wednesday PM 1700-1915
This is a pretty typical tight passive old man table, and with my hoodie on + vodka/red bull in hand, I know it’s time to crack some big pairs and tilt these old boys.
I proceed to play one of my best sessions of the trip, probably because I actually got some sleep prior to playing. I found that I only played my A game about 2-3 sessions total this trip, and generally they were when I was well rested, not when I had been up 40 hours and powering through on coffee/red bull.
I am in the 3 seat, with the super-limper in seat 2 on my right. He is a man in his 50s who will limp-call with ATC, plus he shows me his cards every hand, sometimes
even when I’m in the hand with him. He consistently is showing me 72, 83, etc. He’ll limp with everything. He actually is the big stack at the table with about $700, probably because he’s cracking the old men at the other end of the table with his garbage hands.
On my left is a young Israeli guy in seat 4 and there is a big wrestler type with a developmental disability in seat 5 (I think mainly just a bit of speech delay, with normal motor and social development skills). Both are really nice, and I feel bad felting both of them during the session.
Seats 6-9 are a bunch of cranky, nitty old men. Everyone knows this type of player. The ones you love to play suited connectors and one gappers against for PF raises, then they bitch and moan when their aces are cracked. Usually the board reads something like 789JQ with a flush out there and they flip out when someone has a straight, flush or two pair. Maybe they all have double vision and when they look at pocket aces they actually see quads.
First notable hand comes up when I am in the CO with 10d8d (200 behind). MP old man bets 10, I call, as do button and SB.
Flop K1010 rainbow. SB leads out for $5 into $40 pot, old man raises to $20. I figure that I am huge in this spot against the old man’s range, and probably well ahead of the young guy who led out with the really weak $5 bet. I flat call the $20, which is a bit higher risk, but I don’t mind having the callers behind me with a chance to win a really big pot.
The button also calls (surprise), as does the SB. Pot is now $120. Turn brings a 7d and it goes check-check to me. I bet $60, button folds, SB shoves for $130 total and MP old man folds. I call the extra $70, hoping not to see I am outkicked.
River brings a 6 and V tables J9os for the double gutty draw, while my trips hold up for a nice pot.
Shortly thereafter, I have 44 in LP and call a $10 PF raise against the same old man. Flop comes something like 932 with two spades.
He c-bets about $10, and I figure I could be winning against any two offsuit broadway or AK, or crushed against pocket JJ, QQ, KK, AA. I figure I can peel one off and re-evaluate based on his turn action.
I call the flop and turn comes a 10s. He checks and with the three spades on the board, I bet $25. He calls, and now I feel I may be behind to something like JJ, as I don’t see him calling with two overs in this spot. Pot is $90.
River is another spade, putting 4 spades on the board. He looks disgusted, and I am now almost sure he has a big pair, but hates the four spades. He checks to me, and with my 4-high flush (I have the 4 of spades), I make a $30 value bet. He calls and based on his facial expression, I am almost 100% my flush is good here. I proudly table my pocket fours and he mucks disgustedly. I rake in the $150 pot.
A few hands later, I am in a hand with the same old man and make another very thin value bet with top pair, crappy kicker. He pays me off again and asks me, “Do you hate America”. I am really confused by the question, so I say “No, I love America”. He says “You’re not from America, are you”. I tell him I’m from Canada and he then says in all seriousness “I am from America, but I hate it. I love Canada”
It was a very strange exchange, to say the least. At that point I just stack the old man’s chips and keep my mouth shut.
In a final great hand from this session, I call another old man’s $12 PF raise with 57dd on the button. The SB (young Israeli guy) also calls and the flop comes 46J rainbow. Check-check-check.
Turn is a 2s. Checked to me and I semi-bluff $20 with my OESD. SB calls, as does old man. Pot is now $96.
River is a gorgeous 3h, giving me the nuts. Old man checks and I value bet $50. SB shoves over me for about $150 total. Old man folds, I call. He tables pocket 33, and made a set on the river, while I made the nut straight. Basically the miracle river card for me. I rake another big pot.
I have a pretty loose table image by this point, since I’m drinking, wearing a hoodie, and showing down 810, 44 and 57 to win pots. The young Israeli guy re-buys for $150 and I felt him with a set of yaks about 3 hands later, when he has TPTK and shoves over me on the flop.
My stack is up around $1000 after two hours, so after playing one hand terribly from the BB and losing $70, I cash out +$700 for the session.

Wifey and I then go for dinner at E by Jose Andres, the secret restaurant housed within Jaleo (Cosmpolitan). Outstanding 20 course meal, almost on par with Alinea in Chicago. If you're a foodie like us, look this place up on Chowhound and treat yourself. They only do 2 seatings of 8 people per night, we were the 865th and 866th guests to dine there. Pretty special place. 3 courses of Iberico ham, as well as the raspberry snack and apricot dessert will blow your minds.
$250/person including tax and tip. Totally worth every penny.

Session 7: Aria Thursday AM 0000-0130
Play some 1/3 PLO and swing from up $100 to down $35 for the session.
One hand I flop the straight flush with Q9hh on a J108h board. V flops a K high flush, but only has $60 behind, while everyone else at the table has $500 plus. He gives me his $60, but why couldn't it be someone else?

Session 8: Bally's Thursday AM 0230-0600
I hear from miamicane that TBC is at Bally's around 0215 so I head over there to finally meet the infamous TBC. Alas, he has left when I arrive at 0230. I sit down and promptly donk off about $60 of my $200 stack calling PF raises with small pocket pairs.
Then my new all-time favorite hand happens. Table is pretty loose, so I have tightened up when the following occurs. UTG raises $15, UTG +1 pops it to $45. A couple of folds and I look down at KhKd in the CO. I can either call here, and try to get away from an Ace high flop, or just jam, especially considering the type of table I'm at. I ship my $140. UTG+1 calls with AdAh. Cooler alert!
Flop comes A23, so I am drawing to the runner-runner kings. Turn comes a 5, and get ready for it ...... River is a 4 for the chop. Crazy. I decide the poker gods must be shining on me, so decide to stick around a little while longer. (Originally I had just come to find TBC, and would have left if I had lost the AA vs. KK hand)
About 15 minutes later, I am in the HJ with K10dd. There are a few limpers, including UTG guy who has no idea what he is doing. I pop it to $12, and get UTG guy and another limper to call.
Flop is KKK. Yahtzee, but how can I get paid? Check-check-check.
Turn is a Q. UTG bets $10 and MP folds. I smooth call, hoping he will lead out again on the river.
River brings a 10 and UTG checks. Figuring that I will not be getting paid with a value bet, I go for the overbet to represent the bluff. He has about $60 left, so I bet $60 into the $56 pot. He thinks for about 30 seconds and calls. Great, I have the nuts, and he tables J9os for the rivered straight on a KKKQ10 board. Awesome!
Two hands later, the dealer, Joe, deals the player on my left quads as well, when she flops quad jacks.
Joe almost deals the Club Royal (over $10000 payout) in the same down, when another loose German guy has KQcc and flop comes Jc10cX. It is checked down and he actually ends up losing the hand when the turn and river brick out.
I then hit my second straight flush of the night with Q9ss about 10 minutes later. I flop the OESFD and river the king of spades. Not only do I make $250 for the high hand bonus, but the V pays off my river bet of $120 with a 7 high flush. Woohoo!
One more notable hand occurs when I pick up 4c5c in the SB. Crazy loose German pool player bets $12 from EP. Nitty but nice French guy from Paris calls in MP, as does button. I figure this will be an easy hand to play, as I’ll hit huge or check-fold the flop if I miss, so I call the extra $11.
Flop is A45 with 2 hearts. Bingo! I lead out for $25, EP folds and nitty French guy shoves for $125 total. Button folds, and I am pretty sure that I am way ahead here. I only fear AA, but I think that even this rock 3-bets PF with AA. I tell him that I’m pretty sure he has AK, and call. Sure enough, he has AK and I fill up on the river for good measure.
Shortly thereafter, it is déjà vu, as I flop two pair on an A42 flop against the same V. I value bet the flop and turn, but miss a bet on the river. He has AK again, and I win. After nearly felting him twice, he goes to his room for the night. Interestingly, this same V will get me back a few nights later.

In a final, strange pot from this session, I have pp10 hold up. EP ($47 behind) bets $15, and I call in MP. Button shoves over the top for about $50 total, EP calls, and I call as well. (Only $35 into pot of $112)
Board comes AKJ94. I’m dead, right. I table my 10s, knowing any JQKA are good here. Both other players muck, and I cannot figure out what the hell they had.

All in all, end up +$612 for the session after having my stack up around +$850 at one point. Oops. Give about $50 in tips to the dealers because of the sick rungood.

Head back to my room and sleep for about 3 hours. Head to Lotus of Siam for lunch, where we get some Tom Yum, steamed sea bass with ginger sauce (the nuts!) and the grilled prawns (also great). We didn’t get the usual duck in cognac curry, (the second nuts on their menu), and I kind of missed not getting it.
Drank a 2007 Reinhard and Beate Knebel Spatlese, which was tremendous. Such a fantastic producer, only 7 acres in the lower Mosel, near Winningen. Only Dee Vine wines in California imports this producer, but you should seek them out if you are a Riesling lover.
Also had a 2004 Robert Weil Kiedricher Grafenberg TBA, which we got for a great price, thanks to Bank (wine director and generally super nice guy). It’s a TBA, so it was very primary and sweet, as expected. Neat experience though.
Then went downtown to go shopping at the Outlets for most of the day.

Session 9: V, 2000-2300
This was one of those sessions where big pairs and playing too loose really cost me. I made two ill-timed bluffs against the competent players at the table, and both called me down with medium holdings (eg. 2nd or 3rd pair). Unfortunately, the best player was directly to my left, and there was a pretty good baseball player guy on my right as well.
The remainder of the table was three tourists (2 from Paris, one from Iran) who bought in short, and played very tight. There was also a local uber-rock who played 1 or 2 hands in 3 hours, and got his aces cracked in one of them. HAHAHA!
A couple of big pairs also cost me in this session. Our table had just broken and re-formed because 4 players left, and I had moved into the #8 seat, directly to the left of the baseball player from Seattle. I am dealt pocket JJ in the CO, there are a couple of limpers and I pop it to $12. One of the blinds calls (new player who seems to be a competent young guy). We both have about $200 behind.
Flop is 776r. He checks to me and I c-bet $15. He raises to $40. This is a bit of a weird spot for me, and after thinking about it, I call in order to see what he does on the turn.
Turn comes a 10s, putting 2 spades on the board. He leads out for $50. I feel this is a very strong line, and this is his first or second hand at the table. The stack sizes also make it kind of awkward, and I feel my only two options are to shove or fold. Calling leaves me pretty much pot committed, and if he has a 7, I am drawing to two outs. I tank for a minute and fold. Comments on this hand are appreciated.

A few hands later I have QQ in the SB. A few limpers and I pop it to $15. Only caller is the baseball player on my right. Flop comes K high, and I c-bet $15. He raises to $30. This guy has been playing pretty tight, and I’m almost sure that I’m beat here. But, it’s only $15 for a pot of $60, so I call. The turn and river are checked down, and he shows a King for the win.
One more hand I lose with JJ on a K-high flop; I call it a night down $223 for the session.

Session 10: Bally's 0000-0500
Went over to Bally's to find some drunk action, and was sat at a super tight table, while wifey was at a super loose table. Must table change IMMEDIATELY.
I quickly donk off about $150 firing a 3 barrel bluff. I am called by an older guy who has J3os on a 9J795 board. Wasn't sure how he could call 3 streets with such a shitty kicker, but I guess maybe I was the donkey. Executed a nice bluff on him about 10 hands later though, which made up for it.
Finally I get moved to my wife's table, where the action is looser, and start building up the stack.
2nd hand at the table I am in the CO with KJos. Couple limpers to me and I bet $12. Two callers including one in BB and MP.
I had met the guy in MP the night before at Bally's. He was the nitty French guy who lost with AK to my 42 and 45 in two separate hands (above). Thus, he was well aware of my late position raising range, lol.
Back to the hand:
Three of us in the pot of $36 and flop is KJ5 all hearts. Great, but dangerous flop for me. BB and MP check, I bet $30 hoping to take it down or get a call with a weak flush draw. BB folds and MP insta-shoves. It is $98 more to call and I have him covered. I am kind of sick, thinking he may have flopped a small flush, and ask him if he has the flush. He genuinely says yes, so I ask him if he'll show when I fold. He says he'll show one card. He then says he doesn't have the Ace of hearts. I take that as a tell that he does not have the made flush, so I call.
He turns over K10 with the 10h. Turn 8d, river 2h. I guess he deserved that one after I had stacked him with such crappy hands the night before. At least I got my money in good, but would appreciate comments on the hand. Does anyone fold the flop in this spot?

Later in the night, a guy with a big stack two to my left is talking and asks the dealer if he's seen Tony? My wife and I both yell "TBC!!"
Sure enough, the guy 2 to my left for the last hour is DShapiro from VPN. We start chatting with him and the dealer about Tony, and eventually TBC and Miamicane come over from the Trop. Tony only gets in the game for one hand, where he raises PF to $15, gets two callers and check-folds a flop of J93r. He claims he had AK (which I believe is true), and then leaves the next hand with DShapiro (since DShapiro was Tony's ride).

I end up coming back from down $200 to cash out +$145, and wifey cashes out +$470.

We go back to our beautiful room at the Mandarin Oriental and have a great sleep. This is easily the best hotel we’ve stayed at in Vegas. Last trip we stayed at Encore, the trip before was Venetian, and Mandarin Oriental CRUSHES both of them. The bed is the comfiest I’ve ever slept in, the staff greet you by name, and there’s a bench to sit on while riding the elevator. It’s posh. I got a great deal on it (under $100/night), and will keep my eye out for something better than the usual $250/night for September’s trip. For $100/night, I’d live here.
The MO location is great as well. Much closer to the strip than Aria, and only a 1 minute walk to be right on the strip. (Unlike Aria, which is set so far back from the strip)
Have a great sleep until about 3 PM (MO rooms have those curtains that completely block all light, so you can sleep 24 hrs/day in total darkness) then wake-up to go play a little PLO at Aria.
I don’t remember the details of this session, other than playing premium hands where I had the nuts with re-draws to the nuts. It worked like the books say, and I won a couple of pots and cashed out +$378 in 1.5 hours.

Time for dinner at Joel Robuchon. This was another fantastic dinner, with one of the best courses I have ever eaten, “Les Oeufs” (Translation: The eggs). The problem is there is only 1 egg, but what an egg. It’s basically a whole egg covered in small slices of phyllo pastry, then deep fried to make a perfect soft egg. It is then plated on a creme fraiche base, with small (almost brunoise size) salmon cubes. Finally, it is topped with about an ounce of Osetra caviar and gold leaf. Just a bit extravagant. I won’t even say what it cost, but it was phenomenal. Wifey and I both agreed that we’d go back for egg and a glass of Champagne next trip. It was amazing.
We ended up each doing the four course tasting menu, and adding a cheese course. The bread cart was amazing, as was the mignardises cart at the end. The soup and cheese courses were the other highlights, and with 14 cheeses, the 3 best were all from Vermont (Bonne Bouche, Oma and one other) They were excellent.
Okay, I could go on and on about the intricacies of the food, service, etc. but this is a poker blog, so I’ll stop now. Overall, food was 4.5/5, service was shockingly poor considering the standards they should have, and I would go back in the future.

Now it was time for an extreme class switch. Mandarin Oriental and Joel Robuchon to … TBC and Bally’s, lol.
I showed up at Bally’s around 11 PM, and no site of miamicane, dshapiro or TBC. I got sat in a pretty good game, and 24fanatics informed me that TBC was over at Circus Circus, and would be on his way. TBC arrived around 1 AM and we had a pretty good session.

Here are my observations of Tony's playing style. Mostly Tony is just a major nit, and usually gets paid off when he has the nuts. I did see him limp AA and KK preflop UTG in the one hour I was there. He says he always does this, which is just super dangerous in my opinion. This type of play can set you up to win a small pot or lose a big one, I think.
Some highlights of playing at Tony's table:
1)Him perking up when two girls came to the table and asking me how to tell if they were lesbians or straight? He was worried that if he asked to hang out with them, and they were lesbians, they would kick his a@# because they are "militant dykes". I was laughing my ass off.

2)Eating at the table: He was hungry, so brought a milk, snickers, banana, bag of corn chips and sandwich to the table. He quickly munched his way through everything, and had crumbs all over his shirt and edge of the table. The glare that one dealer was giving him (Gianna) was priceless. She basically couldn't stop glaring at him for her whole down. It was hilarious, and I was pissing myself laughing.
Tony, if you are reading this, you need to wash your hands before and after eating at a poker table. Those poker chips are filthy, and like Mrs. Turd says, if you touch your mouth while playing poker, you are basically putting thousands of guys penises and balls all over your face. Tony was sticking his fingers in his mouth repeatedly with the chips, and never washed his hands once, so that's a lot of c$#k and balls, especially for someone who is so anti-homosexual.
Somewhere else in TBC’s blog there was a thoroughly disgusting conversation about eating at the poker table, where Tony basically said that licking one’s fingers is a perfectly acceptable way of cleaning your fingers at the poker table. Tony, this is so damn gross it’s not even funny. Considering mucous membrane (AKA hand-face contact) is the main way that viruses are spread (not droplet/airborne as most people think), I cannot believe you aren’t perpetually sick. The probable reason is that you are the ebola monkey, and the combination of eating at poker tables and living in all the dingiest hotels in Vegas has made you impervious to infection. You must have antibodies to every virus there is.

3)People catch on to the fact that you are a huge nit after you slowroll the nuts a couple of times. If anyone is paying attention, they would also realize that you have serious MUB (Monsters under bed) fears, and you are probably fairly easy to bluff.

4)It would greatly improve TBC’s game if he could not be so focused on how much he is up/down. You are constantly counting your chips (and arranging them in neat, color aligned stacks) and stating how much you are up/down for the session, day, life. Just focus on the game and worry about the wins/losses later. I know you won’t listen to this advice, but it’s pretty hard not to give it when you are saying “I’m down $57” or “I’m up $23” every few hands.

Saturday May 28

After having another great sleep in the Mandarin Oriental bed (Cannot say enough about this bed), I wake up around noon with plans of playing the Aria daily at 1 PM.
I usually play about 1 tourney every 3 days in Vegas, just to switch things up a bit. I just find there is too much variance in tourneys, and there is always an element of rungood that is required to do well. Every tourney becomes a shovefest at some point, and then it just becomes gambling.
So, I sign up for the 1 PM tourney, and my first table is beautiful. 8 tourists, one local old man nit, and me. I am in the 10 seat, and after a few orbits, recognize I have a couple of calling stations on my right, and otherwise a very passive table. Perfect! I order some food using my comps (Pineapple fried rice from Lemongrass – very heavy and greasy, not impressed) and as I am finishing my meal, get moved to another table. Dammit, that table was perfect.
I am now at an upstairs table with a few more competent players, but still generally quite passive. I make some nice bluffs and chip up to around t12,000 (starting stack 8000, 30 min levels). I then hit a couple of nice hands including a runner-runner straight with pp77 and flop top set of queens. I get some action, but in both cases do not stack anyone. Regardless, my stack is about t20,000 at the 200/400 level, and I am running over my table.
At the first break, I am walking to the restroom and spot missingflops at one of the tourney tables. It is the last hand before the break and he has just shipped it and been called. (I think on the turn) They turn their hands up and I believe he had A4 (for ace high, maybe one pair) and V had 10-6os for two pair. Missingflops sees this and spazzes out, which is hilarious because he always seems so calm in his videos. But he is pretty spazzed out here. I introduce myself, and realize that this is probably a bad time. I’m sure I will get some of this wrong, but from what I recall of the hand description, MF bet PF on the button, and was called by loose calling station donk from the SB. Flop was 3 low cards, making V a pair of 6s. MF c-bet and was called. Turn was a 10, MF shipped it, call, game over. Glen, please correct me if I’m wrong.
Anyway, chatted briefly with him and Mrs. Turd, and then he went over to play some sattys at the Rio.
After the return from break, I am doing quite well, and am very happy with my table, position and image. Unfortunately, I get moved again, and this time to a table full of what look like grinders/locals. Multiple hoodies, earphones, and players that I had played in cash games with the previous few days. Dammit! (Jack Bauer impression)
I have about t18000 (big stack at last table, now middle stack here), and promptly felt myself in 2 hands at this table. Yes, the first two hands.
First hand at the table I play like the uber donkiest ever. It is so horrible that it pains me to write it down. I think I am in the BB with 44. A few EP/MP limpers, gets to me and I check. Flop is something like Qs10s2x. I check, MP bets, two callers and in an act of idiocy I figure I can peel one off because I’m getting like 7 to 1 and with implied odds will stack someone if a 4 comes. So, I call. Turn is a 4s. Perhaps it is because I’ve been drinking, but I check, there is a bet, call from MP, fold and then I call. River is a brick, I check-call again and both other players have flushes, one of which is the nuts. I lose about t11,000 on the hand. What the hell was I thinking.

So I am left with about t7100 with blinds at 200-400 (I think). Very next hand I pick up AsKs in SB. EP bets to 900, 2-3 calls, I ship it, happy to pick up the dead money. Original bettor calls with ppQQ, everyone else folds. Q on the flop and I am done. I felt this spot was pretty standard, but I am seriously tilted about the previous hand with the pp44.

With steam coming out of my ears because I’m so angry at myself, I go see Mrs. Turd (who is playing cash), and then sit down to play some cheap, bad odds VP just outside the Aria poker room. 3 spins in I get quad Aces for $200. Cash out, tourney buy-in recovered. Woohoo. I then go sit down and cool off for about 30 mins, and let myself sober up a bit (Too many vodka-red bull during the tourney). I get on a cash game list, and am sat in the cash game by about 1630.

Cash game line-up for this session is:
Seat 1: Young guy, who seems competent, but plays one hand crazy horrible in this session. ($500)
Seat 2: Middle aged tight guy ($300)
Seat 3: Young girl (that looks rather manly) and is a donk ($350)
Seat 4: Nit (don’t care about stack)
Seat 5: Young asian guy who doesn’t seem to be very good ($200)
Seat 6: Young brown accountant guy from Toronto (competent, $700)
Seat 7: Me, donk ($300)
Seat 8: Internet 6-max player. Seems to be solid TAG but not scary, not getting many hands ($150)
Seat 9: British guy with about $150 behind

First notable hand I am in CO with Kd9d. Seat 3 bets PF to $10. One caller, I call purely for position, BTN and blinds fold.
Flop K32r. PF raiser c-bets $15, MP folds, I call. Turn is a 9. Seat 3 bets again, this time about $20. I re-pop to $60. He thinks for about a minute and calls. River is a J, no flush possible. He checks. I value bet $75. He thinks and calls. I show my two pair and he mucks. He says he was ahead on the flop, which probably means he had aces, as I doubt it was a different two pair.
I proclaim “9-ball, corner pocket” in my best Viffer impression, in an imitation of a great hand from Poker After Dark where Viffer spikes a 9 on the turn with K9 and busts Phil Hellmuth’s AK (K high flop). The Hellmuth blow-up is epic, so youtube this hand if you haven’t seen it. My hand was so similar with the turned 9, all I could think about was that PAD episode. Great stuff.
Next notable hand I am OTB with 46os (AKA the nuts). Table is pretty passive (everyone playing premium hands except seat 1), and there are three limpers to me, so I pop it to $12. BB (British guy) calls, as do two others.
Flop is 4410r. Bingo! Checked around to me and I c-bet $30. BB immediately shoves for about $150 total, fold, fold and I can’t get my chips in fast enough. He has an overpair, board bricks out and I scoop the pot. You cannot f$#k with 46os. Plus, this is always great to create a maniac table image.
Seat 9 leaves, and Seats 5+6 do shortly after. New seat 9 is tight young female who is shortstacking with $100, seat 5 is another noob, and seat 6 is an obviously experienced player. He is from Orlando and has come for two months to play 11 WSOP events, this is his 4th year playing the WSOP. We get to talking and he is bummed about Black Friday, as is the young you on my left who had been grinding 100NL online for the last while and has now moved to the live game. Fortunately seat 6 is on my right, as he is definitely a LAG who will bet into any unopened pot and is not afraid to play ATC in an unopened pot. I end up folding a lot more now, as he steals my thunder by raising all unopened pots (which would have been opened by me previously). I don’t get into too many more notable hands and rack up +$344 after three hours.
One hand I do want to discuss is this one played by seats 1 and 6. The two (I thought) best players at the table. I am just returning from the washroom, so might have some details incorrect, but it is pretty hilarious. Seat 6 (WSOP guy has $400 behind) and Seat 1 has him covered. The history between these players is that seat 6 has beat seat 1 in a couple of hands since sitting down, outplaying seat 1 pretty badly.
In this hand, seat 1 is BB and seat 6 is HJ. Folds around to seat 6 who bets $12. Only caller is BB.
Flop is Qh4d7s. Seat 1 leads out for $20, seat 6 raises to $60. Seat 1 calls. Pot is $144.
Turn is a Js. Seat 1 checks, seat 6 bets $100, seat 1 calls. Pot $344.
River is a 2s. Seat 1 shoves. Seat 6 is kind of disgusted but calls pretty quickly.
The showdown is priceless. Any guesses on the hands? Maybe I should put this in the strat forum for it pure hilarity, but seat 6 rolls over Q4 for flopped two pair. Seat 1 shows 5s8s for runner-runner flush, lol. Monsterpotten goes to Seat 1. He then says “I was shoving any river there”, ROFLMAO. Seat 6 is like “wow, you are horrible”, I am pissing myself. Nothing like flatting OOP pre-flop with 58, leading out and calling a raise on the flop with a gutshot draw, calling the turn bet (now with gutty and flush draw), then saying “I was shoving any river”
This was easily my favorite hand of the entire trip, including my own hands where I won money. I am still laughing my ass off. I would say seat 6 played perfectly and seat 1 played this hand worse than anyone possibly could. It was like online poker.
Mwahahahaha!

Dinner time. This time we head to Sage in Aria, as we have heard that it is really great from our Chowhound forum buddies. We both did the 4 course signature menu, which is well-priced at $75/person for app, soup, main and dessert. Unfortunately only 2 out of our 8 courses were good, with the others being uniformly disappointing. Easily the most disappointing meal of our trip.
The only highlight was that they had half bottles of NV Krug for $98, which is retail (or less). The 750s and rest of wine list were usual restaurant mark-up, so this was a huge find. Had some really nice oysters with the Krug, but after that the meal was pretty disappointing. Maybe were just spoiled by Joel Robuchon, E, Raku, etc., but this was not up to par.

After dinner it’s time for one session at the MGM. Every trip I give the MGM one session, as everyone always says the action is so drunk/loose. I have always found it tight and boring, plus I hate the marble tracks on the tables there.
I get sat at a new table in the 9 seat (9 seat table), with the following cast of characters. I buy in for $300 and all others buy in for $100-200.
Seat 1: Guy who has no idea what he’s doing, or even how to play and buys in for $60.
Seat 2,3 and 4: Young guys who buy-in for $150-200 and seem competent.
Seat 5: Mrs. Turd
Seat 6: Asian guy who is semi-competent, and kind of a whiner
Seat 7: Lawyer from Tennessee, kind of loose passive
Seat 8: 50s ish guy who plays very tight, serious MUBs, which I exploit later.
Seat 9: Me

Overall, I get off to a pretty aggressive start, and feel that I play very well this session, but play one hand horribly, and get ultra coolered on another.
Early on in the session I realize that seat 8 has MUBs (eg. Will fold top pair to one bet on the flop) and seat 7 thinks I am completely bluffing all the time.
I am OTB and pick up K8 sooted. A couple of limpers to me, so I pop it to $15. Everyone folds except seat 8 who calls. Flop is K93. Seat 8 leads out for $15 and I call.
Turn is a 5 and he checks. I bet $40 into the $65 pot and he tanks and folds K8 face-up. I am having fun so I say “good fold” and table my K8 face-up as well. You have to be a serious nit/MUBs guy to fold top pair to the loosest player at the table.
An orbit later, seat 7 ($80 behind) is in HJ and bets $7 PF after a couple limpers. I call OTB ($400 behind) with 46os (the nuts) and a couple others call as well.
Flop is 935r. Pretty good one for me. Checked to seat 7 who bets $15 in to $28 pot. I call, others fold. Turn is a beautiful 7 and seat 7 thinks for a minute and checks to me. I have such a loose image and just look at him with a big grin on my face. He only has like $50ish behind, and there’s already $58 in the pot, so use the reverse tell and grab a big stack of chips, and say all in. The whole time, I am just grinning at him. He says “really?”, “all in?” I say, “while I said it, so it’s binding now”. He thinks for 20 seconds and calls.
River is a 9 and I win. He basically just looks at me like I’m crazy. He says that he is determined to beat me in a pot. I had already bet him off a couple pots this session, so he says he is now determined to beat me in a pot, and goes to the ATM to get $200. Hooray!
One more great hand with the nuts, I am again in LP and seat 8 raises PF. I call with 46 sooted this time, and flop is 357. Lovely. I call his flop c-bet and bet the turn. He folds and I win a $90 pot.
Now the hand I misplayed brutally. I am in the HJ ($600 behind) and bet $15 with AsQs, my first legitimate raise of the night. One of the young guys in seat 2 (Button, $190 behind), 3-bets me to $50. Limpers all fold and I think about it and make the call. I think I made the assumption that the guy is young, talkative, and would be capable of making a play at me because of my maniac table image. What I should have been thinking was “this guy has played very few hands, there have been no 3-bets at this table, and most people don’t 3-bet light in live ½ NL”
Flop comes Q72r. I check, he shoves for $140 into the $100 pot. I think about it, ask him if he has kings and he says yes. But, like an idiot, I don’t fold and call with TPTK. He shows kings and I’m down $190.
I violated two rules on this hand. 1)Don’t go broke with 1 pair 2)Don’t go broke with AQ. In that spot, he probably only has AA or KK, and preflop his range was probably 1010, JJ, QQ, KK, AA, AK and maybe AQ. The right thing to do would have been to fold pre-flop, as there was really no getting away from it after I flop the perfect flop for my hand. (And his too) Such an idiot I am.
Now the cooler. I’m still around $410 when I get another good hand, AJos in LP. Couple limpers and I bet $12. Seat 7 (lawyer guy, $150 behind) calls OOP, as usual.
Flop comes J105, can’t remember suits. He donk bets $20, I call. River is another J and he bets about $50. I decide to just ship it here and go all-in. He insta calls with J9os. I table my AJ and he is sick.
All good until the 9 comes on the river and I’m coolered by the 3-outer. I congratulate him for finally winning a pot against me. He collects his chips and says “that’s not how I wanted to win against you”.
Very next hand I lose about $40 when I have trip jacks and lose to a rivered full house on a KQJJQ board.
I am now down $95, and decide the poker gods are angry, so I should leave and clear my head.
We go back to the hotel, Mrs. Turd goes to bed and I head to Aria for a final 3 AM session of hold em and PLO. End up losing $170 when I miss everything after flopping an OESFD and firing three barrels. Nothing of note in the PLO session, so I cash out around 6 AM to get one last sleep in the beautiful Mandarin Oriental bed.

I am not feeling love from the poker gods, so don’t play anymore on Sunday before leaving. We check out the new Tropicana, which is really nice, and head to Mandalay Bay for the first time in two years.
I’m thinking of playing here a lot on my next trip, as it caters to the wealthy, there is lots of walk by poker room traffic, and the convention center is near the poker room. I’m thinking this should combine to make super soft games, and despite all the criticisms of the strict rules in the poker room, it should be profitable. I think the location also discourages local grinders from playing there.
We go to Burger Bar for lunch and we are very impressed. Better than Burger Brasserie, which we like very much. Have a couple of great burgers and onion rings, then head back to Mandarin Oriental.
They have a private car (Mercedes 530) take us to the airport (Balla!) with our super nice driver, Walter. The extras you get at Mandarin Oriental (everyone knows your name, free gym, free pool, no resort fee, private cars to go anywhere) somewhat make up for the cost. I am frantically looking for deals so that I can stay there again.
Unfortunately I don’t see miamicane’s message to play with him on Saturday night, so don’t get to donk it up with him or DTax on this trip. Hopefully next time.

The three biggest conclusions from this trip were:
1)I am not a TAG player. I have realized that I can outplay about 60% of players at each table post-flop, and want to get heads-up post flop as much as possible. I play much better as a LAG, raising almost ATC in unopened pots from the HJ, CO and button. I played very few/any pots from the SB/BB or EP this trip, and it worked great. The one big hand that I played OOP had disastrous consequences, just reinforcing the importance of position.
2)One of my leaks is playing hands purely for hilarity factor when they hit. This was most evident with the spanish inquisition, 63os, which cost me about $100 this trip, lol. That said, 64os and Q10 suited are my two favorite hands and I stacked 3 people with these hand over the trip. I will probably continue with 64 and Q10, but 63 is terrible.
3)Poker players in Vegas are generally horrible, even some of the locals. I slept about 30 hours total in 8 days, and played my A game in 2 sessions, while most sessions I was playing my B, C or F game. I still managed to turn pretty huge profits, even though I could barely read the board sometimes.

Here are the final tallies for poker sessions:
Harrah's, 30 minutes, -$6
Venetian, 5 hours, -$163
Venetian, 3 hours, +117
PHo, 2 hours, +31
Venetian, 4 hours, +193
Venetian, 2 hours, +700
Aria, 1.5 hours, -35 (PLO)
Ballys, 3.5 hours, +612
Venetian, 3 hours, -223
Ballys, 3 hours, +145
Aria, 2 hours, +378
Ballys, 3 hours, +238
PHo, 1.5 hours, +14
Aria, 2.5 hours, +344
MGM, 2 hours, -95
Aria, 1 hour, -134
Aria, 1 hour, 0 (PLO)

Aria 1 PM Tourney -125

Total sessions played: 17 (43 hours)
Total Hold'em Cash games: +2151 (38 hours)
Total tourneys: -125
Total PLO: +343 (4.5 hours)
Total Cash Games: +2494
Total VP: +100

Grand total: +2469
Hourly win rate from tiny sample size, lol: $55/hr (I know this is not sustainable)

All said, I have made 3 poker trips to Vegas, and turned profits of $1200 over 3 days, $2400 over 6 days and $2400 over 5 days. Woohoo!! Small stakes grinder alert. Epic variance and runbad coming up.
The biggest thing is I felt that my cash game skills developed greatly this trip, and I have never made so many good reads, thin value bets or stacked so many people. If I had cashed out at my max profits each day, I would have easily been +4000 for the trip, but I found that I started to play worse once my stack was above $1000 at a $1/2 table. This is another big leak I need to work on.

Thanks for reading everyone, see you in August/September.

TF