I wouldn't play at this poker room if it was the only poker room still operating on planet earth and all others had been destroyed by an alien invasion...
(Knowing the Bellagio they were probably in on it!)
I'd rather play in a smoldering back alley of a warzone sitting just outside the frozen over home of the dark lord, only lighting provided from the fires of burning hair and odor stinging the nostrils
Butt Naked in sub zero temperatures on top of 6 feet of snow with moldy a cardboard pizza box as a table rusty old bottle caps for chips broken beer bottles as drinking glasses, where the only cocktails were dug out of a dumpster and a blind ranting lunatic throwing the cards at us was the dealer!!!!
Playing heads up against my hero a poker brat as he berated me till the end of time for calling off my stack with KK on a board of AK984 with no possible flush available (ty for revision Jason Mercier whom I had the honor and privilege of playing against at the Sahara poker room.
( where I might add you might find me playing in again someday)
When everyone left in the poker world with an attached brain stem would have known he had to have had EXACTLY AA because we were still playing 25 rusty bottle caps deep!
In the background was a Demonic hymn sung by the invading Alien Overlord from another Galaxy alongside the Devil Himself about, me being the stupidest donkey in the history of poker when anyone that could spell the first letter P in poker would have been smart enough to wait for a better spot as Phil did!
As he caught his breath from screaming at me nonstop for 7 years he then adds
That while the rest of humanity had been enslaved by invading aliens from another galaxy other than the two of us and those allowed to play at the Bellagio..that HE is the most unlucky man in the world sitting atop his high horse a Clydesdale in his finest linens.
Because he can't win anymore bracelets as all sites have been vaporized by alien invader's spaceships. And someone on planet zombie donkeys might think he wasn't the greatest poker player in the history of earth!
If you've ever watched or played against him you'd know EXACTLY the type of endless rant I was referencing.
AT LEAST I WOULDN'T HAVE TO PLAY AT THE BELLAGIO!!!
Darn grateful there was an alternative cause I'm an avid poker player!
Action was putrid never ever saw even a decent game!
No promotions
Comps are a joke!
You'll wait so long for a drink you might die of thirst!
Horrible prices for average at best food!
They probably charge for parking!
This poker room treated me and many other swell gentlemen I'm proud to call friends that made a living playing poker in Las Vegas like we were sub human trash not worthy of playing at the worst poker room in the entire history of the las Vegas strip!
I wouldn't wish having to play at this poker room on my worst enemy!
You're more than welcome to join us devil has some good trees lol, we have music from a fallen angel Lucifer.. imagine the audience looking on through the gates to the home of the dark lord... we wouldn't have to complain about lack of air conditioning!
And the best part would be
AT LEAST WE Wont be playing at the Bellagio!
Why does this happen in a frozen over heck?
Cause in this alternative reality Phil is kicked out like I have been from most rooms in Nevada for MUCH less disrespectful and out of line behavior!
Write a letter to be reinstated?!!! I'm the one that deserves an apology letter begging for my business back...
Deserves an apology letter begging for my business back!
I hope you enjoyed my painting with words an image of where I'd still rather play than at this place.
id love to hear your thoughts about my review.... coldequityaces at g mail . C om